10 First Date Questions That’ll Tell You If There Should Be a Second

The first date can give you mixed feelings of emotions. You can cringe and smile; feel exciting and disastrous in a moment. Making the first date a success requires hard work. As much as you’ve tried to be cool and make a good first impression, chances are you would ruin it if you’re not able to carry on conversations.

Where are you from? What do you do? —  are common conversation starters that aren’t what many would consider “spellbinding” on a first date. And since no one wants to waste their time on a meaningless connection, these superficial inquiries are, at best, fruitless. But studies have shown that asking the right questions on a first date can accelerate a connection between two people.

What Are The First Date Questions That Fuel Smooth Conversations?

How well you and the other person connect on the first date will help you determine if a second date is in order. By now, you’d know that topics like religion, politics, and the like are best to avoid if you want a first encounter to stay positive and light-hearted.

So, while you’re staring at each other from across a candle-lit table, perched together on a bench outside a coffee shop or waiting for your film to start at the movie theatre, what kinds of things should you be asking the other person to make sure conversation flows well?

What are 10 First Date questions to ask?

All things well-thought-out, figuring out what to ask someone the first time you go out can be tough and will have you questioning everything. How deep of a question is too deep? Is it considered too soon to ask questions about their job and family?

When on a first date, don’t be too curious to gather the data you need to decide whether or not this individual may be viable relationship material. So, try to keep the balance between keeping things light and information gathering.

To put your mind at ease and help you get the best idea of what kind of first date questions to ask. Consider adding the following first date questions to your dating repertoire.

It’s most important to ask these first date questions in your own style. Don’t forget to observe how your date handles the questions you ask. Sometimes what people don’t say is more important than what they do say.

1. How Are You?

A successful first date is going to require two people who are both present for an evolving, unfolding, and curious conversation as opposed to a series of questions that feels more like an interview than the first chapter of a love story.

On a good first date, you end up meandering down these side roads together instead of asking a question and then receiving a question in return. The question ‘how are you doing these days?’ is hopefully enough to start a conversation that you could get lost in. A one-word answer is definitely not a good sign.

2. What Makes You Unique?

It’s obvious, nevertheless, that the easiest way to connect and have a great conversation with someone is to get them talking about themselves.

Ask about their hobbies, their interests… do they enjoy activities like sports, painting, spending time outside, reading, or dancing? Maybe you will find some similar thing that you both enjoy doing which could possibly be an idea for another date later on if the date goes well.

3. What’s Your Ideal Version Of A Relationship?

Good first date questions should include something to help you hear what your date is really looking for in a partner. Questions that will let you know what their idea regarding creating a family is or if they want to be a power couple, building something like a business with their partner. Similarly, you can ask whether they will like to start a family with a stay-at-home spouse or would rather be one.

To have the best conversation possible, ask the first date questions as if you have no opinion one way or the other, and see where the other person takes it.

4. What Brings You Joy?

The healthiest relationships are the ones made up of two people who can cultivate happiness, wonder, and gratitude in their own lives.

One of the finest first date questions to ask had better help you to see if the other person talks about things, they’re passionate about and enthusiastic about. A red flag would be someone who laughs at the question or holds it in contempt. If you’re someone who is genuinely curious about what makes people nervous, and the person sitting across the table from you thinks a question like this is ridiculous, it could be an indicator that you may not vibe well together.

5. What’s Your Favourite Place on Earth?

It’s ideal to ask questions that give you a glimpse into your date’s life. Great first date questions to ask on a first date should allow you in to your date’s ‘happy place’ and see what kind of settings makes them feel they can be most themselves.

Examples of such first date questions to ask include; do you have a favourite vacation destination? Do you know of a cool hiking trail hiding away behind the river? Do you have a secret place where they can go to relax, unwind, and escape the world?

6. What’s the Most Embarrassing Thing You Can Remember That’s Happened to You?

See if they’re comfortable sharing some of their most memorable embarrassing moments. Talking about our awkward moments shows humility, vulnerability, and a sense of humour — is it important to you that your date can laugh at themselves once in a while?

7. If All of The Animals Were Suddenly Able To Talk, Which of Them Would Be The Rudest?

Oftentimes there’s a self-protective mechanism that exists on a first date, especially if you’ve been burned in the past. A ridiculous question like this helps you assess someone’s capacity for playfulness.

First date questions like this will help you know if you can laugh together and let down your guard. A question that invites creativity and silliness is important, especially on a first date.

8. What Are The Top 3 Qualities You’re Looking For In A Significant Other?

As your conversation is getting serious, you’ll want to hear what they want, as well as what they want to avoid. One of the best questions to ask on a first date should help you know what your date is looking for in the person they’re dating?

It’s not a good sign if they can’t list any qualities or non-negotiables, as it could mean they’re not very self-aware, mature and introspective. You want someone who knows who they are and what they want.

9. Does Someone Think They’re In A Relationship With You Right Now?

This is a serious question which you can ask with a sense of humour and not be asked at the start of your conversation.

It’s one of the most important questions to ask on a first date because it’ll show if they’re still seeing someone (not in a relationship sense, but if something is still going on). For example, if they say they have a crazy stalker ex, that’s code for ‘I’m still sleeping with them.’

10. What’s Your Idea of A Perfect Day?

This can help you understand what the other person enjoys doing for fun. What do they like doing when they’re not working, and would you want to be part of that?

11. What’s Your Relationship Like With Your Parents?

Don’t be confused, what this question is really asking is: what have you seen of love? It will give you a lot of information. Of course, keep in mind that people who didn’t or don’t have a good relationship with their parents can still heal and be wonderful partners.”

12. Are You Still Close With Childhood Friends?

This question gives you information about their ability to have long-term relationships, do they keep in touch with people? Are they able to maintain friends for a lengthy amount of time? You want someone who has their own friends and their own life, who isn’t a chameleon, blending into their significant other’s life.

Wrap It Up!

First dates can be slightly uncomfortable, no matter how strong that initial chemistry feels. But these questions can help you break through the initial awkwardness to find your ideal match.